et-i-quette - 1. conventional requirements as to proper social behavior. 2. a prescribed or accepted code of usage in matters of ceremony.
A trend is developing in our local soccer communities. On several occasions in recent months, I have been witness and victim to instances of disrespect amongst our local coaches. This in itself is reason to be concerned, but what is even more troubling is that the coaches / players in question do not seem to realize or care they are doing anything wrong.
Just last weekend, I was running a training session at a local field for a group of players. A field that we had booked and paid for. We had 45 minutes remaining in our practice when two teams for a game following our practice began to arrive. We had paid for use of the entire field (astro-turf), but were only currently using 1/3 of it. One of the teams decided to begin their warm-up routine on the other half of the field. The second team, seeing the other team warming up, decided they too would begin to warm-up … on the same half of the field we were using for training!
I briefly gave the coaches in charge the “evil eye”, but they failed to notice because they were too busy shouting instructions to their players on what they wanted during their warm-up routine.
I contemplated what my next course of action should be? I thought about changing my practice set-up to involve a shooting exercise … aimed directly at the teams in question! Maybe then they would get the point. Just then, a ball went astray and rolled directly towards me. Here was my chance. As I stopped the ball, I was able to make eye contact with the offending coach. He just looked at me with a blank stare. After a brief moment, he turned away and went back to his shouting routine.
Now what? I could feel my temper beginning to rise and I considered confronting the coach directly at that moment. I have taken this approach in the past with mixed results.
On some occasions, the coach in question has simply been naïve, and upon being informed, is apologetic. On other occasions, the coach in question has been very confrontational, as if we had been doing something wrong to them. On this day, I was tired, and did not feel like going through the hassle. There was 20 minutes left in our practice, and I decided to just let it slide.
I momentarily toyed with the idea of waiting till their game began, and then sending my players out onto the pitch to finish our practice. Of course, I decided against this, as I did not want to involve the kids, and two wrongs do not make a right, but I think I would have gotten the point across.
Does the situation sound familiar to anyone? How about watching players / coaches cutting across the corners of the field while a game is on? How about teams warming up on the narrow sidelines during a game or practice only to have their balls bounce into your practice or game? These are but a few examples. Not only are there serious liability issues involved, but for me they all stem from a lack of respect for our peers, and the game itself.
What is the solution? Coaches need to be more aware of their actions and how it affects the team / players around them. I have been in situations where my team shows up early, and only half of the field is being used. I am no different in that I would love to see my team get an early jump on their warm-up or practice. The difference is … I ask if it is ok. I will wait for a moment when the coach is not focused on his practice and ask him / her if he minds if we use the field. Sometimes, they say “yes”, other times they say “no”. If the answer is “yes”, I make sure we are as little distraction as possible (no shouting, stray balls, etc.). If the answer is “no”, we sit quietly on the sidelines and patiently wait for our turn. Bottom line is, I have shown the respect and courtesy that every coach and team deserves (and paid for!). My players see this, and in return learn valuable lessons they can use in their own everyday lives.
"Respect the game and it’s participants.”
